Y’all want to know why I’m not internet dating any more?

This is an ad in the book I’m working on and my reaction to the tiny little line of text I found.  I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS. Why the hell do they rent storks? Who would ever need to rent a stork? Where do they get storks? Do they have a pen of storks hanging out in the backyard waiting to be rented? Is that even legal? Are they wild storks or are they trained? Can you walk a stork on a leash? Why does the word stork continue to get funnier every time you use it? WHY ON EARTH WOULD ANYONE NEED TO RENT AN ACTUAL STORK?
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This is an ad in the book I’m working on and my reaction to the tiny little line of text I found. 

I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS.

Why the hell do they rent storks? Who would ever need to rent a stork? Where do they get storks? Do they have a pen of storks hanging out in the backyard waiting to be rented? Is that even legal? Are they wild storks or are they trained? Can you walk a stork on a leash? Why does the word stork continue to get funnier every time you use it? WHY ON EARTH WOULD ANYONE NEED TO RENT AN ACTUAL STORK?

I really have to learn the NATO alphabet.

I’m really bad at coming up with words to associate with letters on the spot. T as in … uhh … tamale. A as in air conditioning? What is that?

For pete’s sake, I already know most of it, I just have to remember to use it. Tango Alpha makes so much more sense.